The Joys of Herbology - Prologue

Snape and the Marauders' 4^th Year at Hogwarts

Professor Samling looked expectantly at his 4^th year herbology class, waiting for them to settle down.  A pair of giggly Hufflepuff girls were whispering to each other in the back and eying a particularly unkempt Slytherin boy across the room.  A gaggle of Slytherin males were similarly occupied flicking azuranth seeds at a bespectacled Hufflepuff girl, who had her nose in a book and was attempting valiantly to ignore them.

“Now then, if I might begin?” the Professor queried with eyebrows raised.  His students reluctantly switched their attention to the front of the room.  “That’s better.  I require  your full attention today because I’m going to give you all the details for your term project.” Students started eying each other in confusion.

“But sir,” protested a blonde Slytherin boy, “there is no term project in Herbology, and never has been.”

“There is now, Mr. Malfoy. This is a new idea I’ve had but I expect that it will have spectacular results.”  Several of the students groaned audibly.  “None of that, please.  You should be pleased about this little change because the term project will replace the weekly essays I formerly assigned to my class.”  This knowledge seemed to improve the classes’ mood somewhat.

“Now, on to the details.  The assignment will be due the last class period before the Christmas holiday.  No late projects will be accepted so please do not procrastinate.  There will be a written component and a practical component, which shall be equally scored.  This project will total half of your grade for the term so please treat it accordingly.  You will be working in pairs, each pair will have a different species to work with and a different goal to accomplish for that species.  I will be assigning these once the pairs are formed.”  Several students looked to the student next to them, silently pairing up with their friends.

“Oh yes, I almost forgot to mention the most important thing.  You will be permitted to choose your partner, however…” the Professor paused for emphasis, “ you cannot partner with someone from your own House.”  The ambient noise increased as the students absorbed this blow and made as if to protest.

"My mind is made up.  For thirty seven years I have taught here and this pointless bickering between the Houses has become progressively worse each year.  What used to be healthy competition has become spiteful malignance and I for one am beginning to tire of it.   Thus, by the time you return to class Monday I expect each of you to be partnered with a member of the other House, or I will assign the pairs myself AND take ten points from each of your Houses for each person unpaired.  Class dismissed.”

Severus Snape began gathering his books accompanied by a feeling of dread.  How on Earth would he find a partner for this farce of a class project?  Most of the students in his OWN house scorned him, let alone those foppish happy-go-lucky Hufflepuffs.  He’d best wait til Monday, let Slytherin be docked ten points and be done with it.  He wasn’t bad in Herbology, so he could more than compensate for whatever dunce Professor Samling saw fit to torment him with.  He stood, tossed his pack over one shoulder and headed for the door.  He had Potions class next, that would distract him from this unpleasant turn of events.

“Severus…”  Snape heard a girl call out from behind him.  He turned to face a tall Hufflepuff girl with long, curly brown hair.  Mariah something or other.  She’d never spoken to him before, and he knew little about her except that she was generally well liked (except by Slytherins of course) and that she was one of the smarter Hufflepuffs, if that could ever be said of a Hufflepuff.  Her fellow Housemates often teased her about her grades, saying that maybe she should have been in Ravenclaw, but she insisted that she really was only good at a couple subjects and wasn’t really all that smart.  In any case, he was at a loss as to why she would wish to speak with him.

“Yes?” he asked suspiciously.

“Would you be my partner for the Herbology project?” She looked up at him expectantly, as if this were an everyday request.

He stared back at her, too shocked to answer.  “Why not,” he thought, “At least I’ll be spared the humiliation of having Samling force some imbecile of a partner on me.” He nodded affirmatively, and then turned to leave. He took a few steps, but then, alas, curiosity got the better of him.  He stopped and looked back at Mariah, who was still standing there watching him.

“Why me?”  he asked. 

“You’re the best at Potions, I’m the best at Herbology,” she reasoned.  “Since chances are we’ll need some potions for whatever task Samling’s cooked up, we shouldn’t have any trouble making an ‘Outstanding’, should we?”   Snape just stared at her.  “Well, we should get going if we’re not going to be late for Potions.  Shall we go?”  Mariah moved toward the door, then turned back as if waiting for him to join her.   

This is too bizarre, Snape thought, but followed her out of the classroom.  The two headed toward the dungeons silently for a few moments but then Mariah spoke again, “So what do you think old Samling might have us do?  Maybe we’ll get to design a new hybrid species… or devise an antidote for purple hemlock poisoning or something neat like that…” Mariah continued hypothesizing and looking at Snape for confirmation, but never waiting for him to respond.  Which was probably a good thing because Snape was becoming more and more uncomfortable…what a chatterbox this girl is, he thought.  How will I put up with her for an entire term?  He stopped walking suddenly.  Mariah took a few more steps, still chattering, until she realized she was no longer being accompanied.  She looked back at Snape inquisitively, then walked back to him.  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Look, Hufflepuff… I have no idea what the project will be nor do I wish to waste time hypothesizing.  If we’re going to work together then you should know that I really have no use for idle chit-chat.  We’ll find out what we have to do on Monday, and at that point we can formulate a strategy for completing the project as quickly as possible, and with as little interaction as we can manage.  Understand?”

Mariah pursed her lips and glared back at him.  “Perfectly.  And if we’re going to work together YOU need to understand something as well.  I have a name.  It’s Mariah.  Mariah Grougher.  Not girl, not Hufflepuff, nor anything else your Slytherin mind might come up with.  Use it.” Mariah took a deep breath.  “Now I’m going to class.  You can join me or not.”  She stormed off, curls bouncing behind her.

At least she’s got some spunk, Severus thought with grudging respect as he followed behind her.  It could be worse.

The weekend progressed without serious incident, only a minor altercation in the hall with his arch-nemesis, Sirius Black, interfered with his self-imposed solitude.  But seeing as Snape came out the victor in that little exchange (and Black came out with three eyes) all in all it was a pleasant weekend.  He saw Mariah at each meal of course, from across the great hall.  She made no move to speak to him, nor even look at him, so he was spared any teasing from his House brethren.  Nothing good ever came from associating outside of class with other Houses.  Still, a part of him was surprised that she did not so much as glance his direction.  It would have been such a Hufflepuff thing to do, after all.

Monday finally came, and Snape’s morning classes were mundane as always.  Divination in particular was a total waste of time.  Professor Rodinsky was as usual predicting all sort of havoc for her students, and as usual convinced Snape of none of it.  After class as he was leaving she approached him and requested a quick word. 

“Yes, Professor?”  Snape didn’t even try to conceal his annoyance at being detained.

Professor Rodinsky gazed intensely at Snape, almost as if she were focusing deep inside him. “Do not leave until the end.  Otherwise you will suffer great pain.”  The Professor paused, still staring at Snape, then continued, “That is all, you may leave now.”  She went back to her desk and began straightening papers.

What a fraud, Snape thought as he left the room and headed for Herbology.